Today is Valentine’s Day - a day to celebrate the love you shared with your loved ones. Although you can wish any loved one - parents, siblings, friends, your boss etc - in India, it is mainly used to express your love to your boyfriend or girlfriend. Gifts are given and can range from flowers plucked stealthily from the neighbour’s garden to diamond necklaces worth your two month’s salary. On this day, some get extra courage to propose1, others have contests as to who’ll receive the most V-Day cards/gifts, yet still others yearn longingly and hope for even a scrap of paper hoping someone will acknowledge they exist on this earth. But I’m not going to talk about any of these people. I’m going to talk about someone who has always treated V-Day with caution and a sense of dread - me.
For me, V-Day has always remained elusive. It’s a time where the investment is not worth the return. The thing is when I’d a girlfriend, I’d have started saving my pocket-money from two months back for that special gift on this special day to that special person. Yet, nothing extra-ordinary happened on this day. I didn’t make any new girlfriend, didn’t receive my first kiss, didn’t … ok, let’s leave it at that. And when I didn’t have a girlfriend, it was too embarrassing to say I don’t have anyone to celebrate it with. Let me recap my past V-day experiences.
1983-1995: Imphal - Still a juvenile, where the only awareness of the female species is that they have longer hairs (and cried a lot more, too).
1996: Imphal - Somewhat aware but video games still were a more attractive option than girls.
1997: Imphal - Immensely infatuated with a girl. Vague recollection. Probably spent the whole day daydreaming and thinking up of ways as to how to propose1 to that girl.
1998: Imphal - My first real V-Day. Feigned illness, didn’t go to school and went for a date (with the girl I’d a crush on last year). Nothing happened other than touching her hand.
1999: Imphal - Matric exam just round the corner but that didn’t stopped me from going on a date. Asked for a kiss - refused.
2000: Delhi - Called up long distance to my sweetheart. Spent 200 bucks (quite a lot during those days, I was a student, for God’s sake), not to mention the gift. (Have to check with my ex how much I spent on her, which I’m definitely not going to do).
2001: Delhi - Much similar to previous year. 12th board exam after two weeks.
2002: Bhopal - Now this one was nice. Hmm hmm hmm. I’m not gonna reveal the juicy details here, so forget it.
2003: Delhi - Had a fight just before V-Day. Spent the day hurt at Delhi at my bro’s place. Weather was cold and chilly, suited my mood perfectly.
2004: Imphal - Girlfriend had exam, opposed quite fiercely (and emotionally) to my coming to her place. Went home instead and called her up. Later, I realized she didn’t want me to come because she wanted to spend the day with someone else.
2005: Imphal - Had broken up with the aforementioned girlfriend by now. Thought I was in love with two girls (quite wrongly). Stood up a date with a third girl because some powerful people have got anti-Valentine day sentiments in the city. First time, I let my head ruled over my heart. (Later I came to know she also didn’t come, but that’s not the point).
2006: Bangalore - Had broken up with my new girlfriend a few days before. So, spent this day passably alone (my manager and colleagues don’t count as company). It’s another matter that we patched up a few days after.
2007: Bangalore -No date today, so spending the day writing this blog.
So, as you can see, V-Day didn’t turn out to be very special to me. Most of the special days (first sight, first holding hand, first kiss, etc) happened on non-festive days. Well, I gather that it’s not the day which makes an event special but it’s the event which makes a day special. But still being the rank-sentimentalist that I’m, I still dream of flowers, chocolates, candle-lights, music, sensuous kisses, and a satisfying breakfast the day after with the person I love. I know it’ll come true someday - just hoping I hadn’t turn 50 before it happens.
Cheers and dedicated to all the lovers in this world. Hope you have a special time. Happy Valentine’s day.
Au Revoir,
Bij
1. Propose, in this context, means declaring your love and usually doesn’t involve getting your knees dirty, diamond rings, and committing oneself to a lifelong sentence.
For me, V-Day has always remained elusive. It’s a time where the investment is not worth the return. The thing is when I’d a girlfriend, I’d have started saving my pocket-money from two months back for that special gift on this special day to that special person. Yet, nothing extra-ordinary happened on this day. I didn’t make any new girlfriend, didn’t receive my first kiss, didn’t … ok, let’s leave it at that. And when I didn’t have a girlfriend, it was too embarrassing to say I don’t have anyone to celebrate it with. Let me recap my past V-day experiences.
1983-1995: Imphal - Still a juvenile, where the only awareness of the female species is that they have longer hairs (and cried a lot more, too).
1996: Imphal - Somewhat aware but video games still were a more attractive option than girls.
1997: Imphal - Immensely infatuated with a girl. Vague recollection. Probably spent the whole day daydreaming and thinking up of ways as to how to propose1 to that girl.
1998: Imphal - My first real V-Day. Feigned illness, didn’t go to school and went for a date (with the girl I’d a crush on last year). Nothing happened other than touching her hand.
1999: Imphal - Matric exam just round the corner but that didn’t stopped me from going on a date. Asked for a kiss - refused.
2000: Delhi - Called up long distance to my sweetheart. Spent 200 bucks (quite a lot during those days, I was a student, for God’s sake), not to mention the gift. (Have to check with my ex how much I spent on her, which I’m definitely not going to do).
2001: Delhi - Much similar to previous year. 12th board exam after two weeks.
2002: Bhopal - Now this one was nice. Hmm hmm hmm. I’m not gonna reveal the juicy details here, so forget it.
2003: Delhi - Had a fight just before V-Day. Spent the day hurt at Delhi at my bro’s place. Weather was cold and chilly, suited my mood perfectly.
2004: Imphal - Girlfriend had exam, opposed quite fiercely (and emotionally) to my coming to her place. Went home instead and called her up. Later, I realized she didn’t want me to come because she wanted to spend the day with someone else.
2005: Imphal - Had broken up with the aforementioned girlfriend by now. Thought I was in love with two girls (quite wrongly). Stood up a date with a third girl because some powerful people have got anti-Valentine day sentiments in the city. First time, I let my head ruled over my heart. (Later I came to know she also didn’t come, but that’s not the point).
2006: Bangalore - Had broken up with my new girlfriend a few days before. So, spent this day passably alone (my manager and colleagues don’t count as company). It’s another matter that we patched up a few days after.
2007: Bangalore -No date today, so spending the day writing this blog.
So, as you can see, V-Day didn’t turn out to be very special to me. Most of the special days (first sight, first holding hand, first kiss, etc) happened on non-festive days. Well, I gather that it’s not the day which makes an event special but it’s the event which makes a day special. But still being the rank-sentimentalist that I’m, I still dream of flowers, chocolates, candle-lights, music, sensuous kisses, and a satisfying breakfast the day after with the person I love. I know it’ll come true someday - just hoping I hadn’t turn 50 before it happens.
Cheers and dedicated to all the lovers in this world. Hope you have a special time. Happy Valentine’s day.
Au Revoir,
Bij
1. Propose, in this context, means declaring your love and usually doesn’t involve getting your knees dirty, diamond rings, and committing oneself to a lifelong sentence.
2 comments:
The Wheel weaves as the Wheel wills.
Those are not the only breaking of your heart you are going to suffer in this life. You may fear that your last one may be the last of all. But do not be disheartened. I feel its ache, but it has not shaterred yet!
:)
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